Silly Scenario (Day 3)

My jeans fit just a little bit looser today.  I really wish I had a scale so I had some idea how much fat I'm losing during this challenge...  Oh, and I pee a lot.  A LOT, which I guess is good since I'm getting rid of the bad stuffs.  With my health problems this challenge is especially important to me.  

Scenario

Clumsy woman burns tips of fingers on scalding hot stove (accident prone woman sadly has managed to unintentionally involve herself in many weird but true incidents).  Woman cries from third degree burn.  A few weeks pass and the burn begins to heal.  A few more weeks and what's left is just a scar.  Healed skin.  

Did the woman have to put chemicals in her body to heal the wound?  No.  Did the woman need medicine?  No.  The body has the ability to heal itself.  I guess my point is while there is a time and place for doctors and medicine I truly believe some, if not most, ailments can fix themselves if the body is healthy.  Our bodies are a temple, yet we unknowingly abuse them by the secretive poisoning of the food industry.  Now while I do have faith in God I'm not some Bible thumping shove-it-down-your-throat Old Testament follower that says don't cut your hair, don't eat pork (aka bacon - YUM), and don't get tattoos (I have four), but we can lead much happier healthier lives if we take care of our body.  Cleanse, eat clean - not processed chemical sprayed or boxed foods, and exercise, friends.  

  

Carb Craving

Two opportunities for warm gooey-cheesy pizza and a crisp cool carbonated adult beverage were turned down yesterday by my...dun dada daaaaa...WILLPOWER!!!

More to write later, as for right now I feel pretty crappy with a headache and nausea.  Time for a Spark 

Day 1

In reverent fear of missing bad-for-you-foods I totally binged last night, raiding the fridge and the pantry of anything and everything I love including that deliciously dry burgundy wine...  Even writing about it makes me salivate.  Obviously I have a "problem"...

So here I sit, gassy and bloated and slightly hung over, looking at this box of Advocare stuff.

I can do this.  I need to do this.

Spark is awesome!  I am sold on this stuff.  I had one yesterday because I was really struggling to stay motivated, and I felt AWAKE.  Not heart racing jittery sort of awake but simply awake and ready to take on the day.

The fiber drink is alright if you love pulpy orange juice.  I drink it fast so it's done.  (WARNING: DRINK IT FAST!  Otherwise it turns thick and has the consistency of that stuff that blows out of disposable diapers when they're too wet.  That gelatinous goo...  Blech!!  So, drink it fast).

Breakfast:  I'm going to have one of Blanch's eggs (my favorite sweet hen), a small portion of steel cut oats, and lemon mint water.

Lunch:  Romaine lettuce, salmon, sliced raddish, sliced cucumber, sliced tomato, and a celery stick.  Lemon mint water again.  Have to go to the store, I'm missing my complex carb

Oh, and when the husband isn't working I will post a "before" photo so I stay motivated during this whole thing.

This is IT!

Me:  "My clothes don't fit!  None of them!!  

Husband:  "You look fine, honey"

Me (through tears):  "I'm so sick and tired of feeling like this.  I'm big.  Not just big, but huge!  I've never been this huge...EVER!"  

So there you have it.  That happens...daily.  Three years ago, even after birthing five babies I was still able to feel confident struttin my stuff in next to nothing at the pool. Lean and lanky, my arms were scary thin and my legs couldn't grow muscle no matter how many times I shakily tried to push on that damn leg press.  I swear if I turned sideways (pre-boob job) I would be almost invisible.  My diet consisted of tortilla chips and red wine, at night only, because I was too busy juggling kids and work and, of course, my two hours a day at the gym.  

Looking back though, was that even healthy?  I wanted to be beautiful with that silky smooth flat belly and not a single cellulite dimple, but at what cost?  I developed over the years a strong dependence on laxatives and an extremely poor self image.  People comment to me things such as, "YOU'VE had five kids?  You don't even look like you've had one!", which even though their intention was positive, I would just go home and look at all myself in the mirror...and barf.

Skinnyfat    (definition from the Urban Dictionary)

A person who is not overweight and have skinny look but still have a high fat percentage and low muscular mass. Usually those people have a low caloric diet, that's why they are skinny, but are not involved in any sports activities or trainings and that's why they don’t have any muscle. Since between the bone and the skin those people only have fat, the skin can be deformed easily because the skin layer is located on an unstable matter (fat).  Skinny fat woman look sexy from a certain distance but they have soft jelly skin and still have some cellulite even if they are in there early 20.

Tomorrow I begin the Advocare 24 Day Cleanse.  It's a start.  My new beginning.  And I will not only rid my body of toxins, but I will ease off of the laxative pills I'm taking every day, incorporate cardio and weights daily, and hopefully develop a more positive self image.  I want to be HEALTHY, not skinnyfat